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Post Info TOPIC: you might be a pro football junkie if....

Kick Asser

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you might be a pro football junkie if....


If you regularly wear a shirt with a number and somebody else’s name on it ...

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leroy

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YOU MAY BE A FOOTBALL JUNKIE IF.......


........your own children are afraid to be around you on Sundays during "THE GAME" because you scream foul things at the TV, you jump up and down, get red faced, wish for very bad things to happen to the opposing players and take sadistic joy in their injury.

Then again.....I think I would have enjoyed "THE GAMES" at the Roman Coliseums as well.

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Kick Asser

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If you watch an NFL game on a television sitting on top of a TV tuned to a different NFL game ...

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leroy

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Excused from all of her family gatherings on Sunday due to football being on, her family reunion is always on the same day as my Fantasy League draft, the Sunday of Labor Day.....have never been to the reunion.

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Head Dick

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Surprise B-Day party for a big wig and personal friend. Its out of state....pre paid...but departs on Sunday at 11 am and returns early Tues morning. I tell the wife and B-Day boy    "No Way....and miss all the football".


Their response....."We're offended you are not going"


My response....."I'm offended you even FUKN asked"



-- Edited by TACOBILL at 07:39, 2006-10-22

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Head Dick

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-three generations of women in your family always check with the men before scheduling any family events on sundays in the fall.

-on mondays after your team loses, friends and co-workers express their sympathies immediately upon seeing you, and are on pins and needles around you all day, without even giving you a chance to prove that you're taking the loss in a mature fashion.

-on sunday mornings, your phone rings incessantly with people wanting to know who to bet, who to start, and who to bench.

-you engage in passionate arguments about who the best broadcast team is / was.

-you know who gave the 'run and shoot' offense its dersive nickname, the "chuck and duck".

-you're a "head dick" on this message board.

-- Edited by saturn11 at 09:33, 2006-10-22

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Kick Asser

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If you think chicken wings go with beer for a formal Sunday family dinner ...

If you have not eaten any Sunday entree for at least two decades that hasn’t been dipped out of a crockpot ...


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leroy

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saturn11 wrote:


-you know who gave the 'run and shoot' offense its dersive nickname, the "chuck and duck".



Buddy Ryan

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Head Dick

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Backinthesaddleagain wrote:

saturn11 wrote:


-you know who gave the 'run and shoot' offense its dersive nickname, the "chuck and duck".



Buddy Ryan




yeah man. and cris carter? why did you let him go, buddy?

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Kick Asser

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If you ever have prayed during Sunday church services for, yeah, well, world peace and cures for diseases, but also a victory for a specific NFL team ...

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leroy

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If you have gametapes dating back to 1998 of your favorite team stacked up in your bedroom closet.

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always kick the browns when they're down

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1998?....LOL...try all the  Bear game tapes from 1984 until the present, and all of the seasons highlight films game by game from 63-68...(highlight films aren't mine but am currently copying them) friend of mine got them online

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Head Dick

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I say 1998 iowa because that's when I got Directtv.


Before that I was lucky to get 4 games a year.



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always kick the browns when they're down

Head Dick

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thats right ...you're in gods country and you get bombarded with the Broncos...Remember my time there....had to run Westminster to the Old Chicago to catch the Bears games back in the late 80s so I feel for you. The one in Boulder didn't have the sat. feed then. Swilling down Bass Ale and singing "Sweet Home Chicago" among all of the other transplants....good times!



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Head Dick

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Hey Iowa I just had a friend move up to Nederland.  He says it's borderline communist up there.


I should probably take a Saturday drive and check it out huh?



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always kick the browns when they're down

Head Dick

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...If you can jack off and finish watching NFL Gameday

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Head Dick

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If you have a Sunday Restraining order on your wife and kids from 10:00 am central to 11:00 Pm on Sunday that prohibits them from setting foot within 200 feet of the two tvs in my living room.



-- Edited by GoBearsGalason at 17:07, 2006-10-24

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Head Dick

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GoBearsGalason wrote:



...If you can jack off and finish watching NFL Gameday



I like the one with Jillian Barberie........



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Head Dick

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Grave Digger wrote:




GoBearsGalason wrote:



...If you can jack off and finish watching NFL Gameday




I like the one with Jillian Barberie........




Thats just a bonus

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Head Dick

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I still like this one the best..... {If you have not eaten any Sunday entree for at least two decades that hasn’t been dipped out of a crockpot ...}...well done


Here's an embarassing one. I think it was the second Eagles game....where the Eagles collapsed on the Gaints.


The kids are away.....the wife isnt bothering me...upstairs doing something. I made a crock of chili thats been cooking for two days.....and the vodka is flowing freely. The Eagles are up big...and I am pounding the Vodka. At late in the 3rd QTR...I must have passed out...or had a little nap as I tell the wife....but no worries the birds are up big.


the wife wakes me to tell me the chili is burning...and stinking up the whole house. And...and  I repeat "And"....she tells me "do you believe this game"...


WTF...my eyes clear....and I see the pass that ends the game for the Birds in OT.


So first I tell the wife...WTF.."you wake me for chili but not a comeback and overtime?" I then proceed to call her a bad luck charm.


Then i get "Your blaming me?".....my response "Your right...its the fukn chili's fault". So I grab the chili...run out to the yard and dump it over the fence.


The Vodka.....well... i put it on ice...we still had some late games.


But to top off this friggin mess....I email my friend jody mac at www.wpen.com  and tell him the story. He is a good guy and enjoys this kind of stuff. Doesnt Jody read the email on the air...while I am working....to people listening to his show who actually know who "TacoBill' really is... With co-workers laughing....I quickly get named the chili-chucker.


Jodys show ends...and i figure the damage is over. But while i am driving home..the new host bring ups the chili chucker. I arrive home...and the wife is still pssed at me. I tell her "dont say a word" and tune in my new radio chili chucker buddies. By this time callers are commenting on the story and the wife gets a good laugh.



 



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Kick Asser

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If the only think you remember Monday morning about all day Sunday is who beat who. 

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"Don't let the meat loaf, baby."

Kick Asser

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if it's 1:04 am on a tuesday night and your posting on this friggin wall...

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Head Dick

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You actually know that Lord Farve and Ray-Ray Lewis are overrated as hell.....

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always kick the browns when they're down

Kick Asser

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brett favre is the future of football...

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Head Dick

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NO HE'S NOT.................

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always kick the browns when they're down

Kick Asser

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he could be the 33rd nfl team in and of himself... and he'd still beat the raiders.

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Head Dick

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Keep telling yourself that.........

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always kick the browns when they're down

Head Dick

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If you've called your teams headquarters and left a message for the coach after a game that your team lost by stupidity.

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Kick Asser

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GoBearsGalason wrote:

If you've called your teams headquarters and left a message for the coach after a game that your team lost by stupidity.


you mean you don't have lovie's cell by now??

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Head Dick

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hark44 wrote:



GoBearsGalason wrote:



If you've called your teams headquarters and left a message for the coach after a game that your team lost by stupidity.




you mean you don't have lovie's cell by now??



If I had It he would have changed it by now. At 6-0 he might get sexually harrassed by me.

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